Wednesday, November 5, 2014

How To Ask Your Girlfriends Dad If You Can Marry Her





How old school are your folks? Some women should seriously come with a big red flashing caution sign: 
ENTER AT OWN RISK.
I just so happen to be one of those lucky ladies.

Yip. It’s literally like I’m living in a bloody 1800’s novel – the man who wishes to make me his wife must seek the approval of my father first.


So, to help all of you other ladies out there who could compete for World’s Most Ridiculously Overprotective Father – I’ve put together a step by step tutorial on how your man can win over your dad (that’s one massive hurdle out the way!) and then get the balls to pop the question to you!

  • Step 1: Bring a really nice bottle of whiskey along to a dinner with her folks.
  • Step 2: Warm up her parents good spirits with a hilarious round of charades (claim to have never played before – then suddenly kick everyone’s ass!)
  • Step 3: Devour all food given to you and gush about how great it was.
  • Step 4: Demolish about 5 glasses goblets of wine, a tumbler filled with scotch and a bottle and a half of whiskey.
  • Step 5: Begin to slur amidst mindless rambles with girlfriends father (mother has mysteriously disappeared to bedroom after her 16th glass of wine).
  • Step 6: Casually blurt out mid conversation, “I’d like to marry your daughter!” Sway in your seat while trying to focus on one of the two visions of said father before you . . . and brace yourself for the cold sweat and silence that follows.
  • Step 7: Once the initial shock is over there are three ways that this can go.
a. A complete and utter disaster. A straight out NO.
b. Really well. He accepts your offer (and you start to feel like he’s actually delighted about pawning off his daughter to be someone else’s problem).
c. He considers your offer – but plans on watching you squirm and grovel just a little bit more by demanding to have a boys day out under more sober circumstances. Basically, he wants to pre-warn you about all of the skeletons hiding in your girlfriend closet so that you know exactly what you’re getting yourself into.  

  • Step 8: If C, begin the squirming and apologizing, trying to say, “it was said in jest! It’s just because I just love her so so much!!” … AHEM…. Suck up. Father at this stage takes slight pity on you and tells you that he knows you will be great and he practically offers his blessing to you on a platter but still wants to take you out for a chat before popping the question to his daughter – the reasons for this chat will forever be unknown to us women.
  • Step 9: With a massive sigh of relief, shake his hand and then continue with the alcohol induced night solely based on marriage discussions from this point on. Let the father of your soon to be bride tell you all of his stories (these will be good and bad,) of proposing and marriage. Finish the night off with a debate about the nitty gritty of prenups and so on.
  • Step 10: Wake up with a ROARING hangover and smelling like a brewery – roll over in bed and look worriedly into your girlfriends eyes and say, “Jade, I think your dad asked me to marry him last night!” 


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62 comments:

  1. This is a really clever post! Made me smile. And it makes me glad I'm an old married lady and don't have to worry about things like this anymore. :D

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    1. Ahh I didn't know you were married Daisy!! xx

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  2. You are so funny and witty, Jade! xxx
    http://littleblingring.blogspot.co.uk

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    1. Thank you! Thank you! I'll be here all week ;)

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  3. well after reading the post I have a question . is what I am thinking right , R U planning tfhe same scene of your life :)
    Kisses,
    www.beingbeautifulandpretty.com
    www.indianbeautydiary.com

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  4. Haha this is a really funny post. I think if I ever get married, my boyfriend wouldn't have to ask permission just because I think that tradition is really dying out.

    vvnightingale.blogspot.co.uk

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    1. You're lucky. I wish someone'd tell my dad that!

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  5. I was just browsing through & stumbled upon your lovely blog - It looks gorgeous and it has interesting posts that I can relate to! - I'm now following you via gfc, Hope you check out my blog & follow? keep in touch x

    Benish | Feminist Reflections
    A Thousand Pieces of You Hardcover Giveaway

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    1. Óf course I've mosy on over and check out your blog now!
      Lovely to meet you!

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  6. hahaha... i like the last rule , ( those nails better look nice for that rock) . My folks espcially my dad is more old school so be careful when trying to seek his permission because it's like attending a job interview , my mum is more perceptive and reads every expression on you. I love this . i am taking notes.

    www.stylenbeautylounge.com

    .

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    1. i know!!! i have horrendous nails and id feel awful having to snap a pic with my nails if or when that day comes!

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  7. Great post! We need more old school in our life!

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    1. yeah i know.... i would be sad if my dad wasnt like this really.. plus it adds a whole new twist :)

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  8. Replies
    1. Thanks Amy :)
      I found the photo on Pinterest and couldn't believe how true it was!

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  9. haha love this

    Check me out
    xx
    Tyana
    theluxedition.blogspot.com
    bloglovin.com/theluxedition

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    1. I'm glad to hear it Alice :)
      Making people smile is such a wonderful feeling

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  11. Did this actually happen, Jade?! If so - most amazing proposal ever! Every marriage proposal should start off with whiskey, I reckon ;) x

    Tamsin / A Certain Adventure

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    1. It really did Tamsin!! hahaha gosh I adore that man of mine :)

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  12. Omg! Brilliant girl! Step 10 killed me, I can't stop laugh!

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  13. Hahaha I loved this, my dad's pretty relaxed luckily, I don't think my boyfriend would ever have the balls to ask him haha!

    India / Touchscreens & Beautyqueens

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    1. Hahahaha a lot wouldn't I don't think.. ;)

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  14. Haha I love this, such a witty post ! I can imagine the entire scene in my head :') Getting on one knee and saying my full name is a must. It would be sweet if he- who ever he is- asked for my dads approval but eh...

    Hope xx
    hopecoyne.blogspot.co.uk

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    1. Thank you Hope!! That's such a sweet compliment! I had such fun writing this post.
      Yeah, one knee, full names.. the works :)

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  15. Jade, I adore this! Many moons ago (smile), my nervous hubby asked my father for my hand in marriage (My father meant well, but was very overprotective.). There was a very lengthy pause filled with silence, but when my father spoke, he told Mark "Be sure and never stop taking her out weekly on dates." Thanks for bringing warm memories back! Hugs, T, http://tickledpinkwoman.blogspot.com

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    1. Awww Tina that is a beautiful story - love that he has always kept to his word!! xxx

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  16. My mom would love it if someone ate all her food and said how good it was. (poor guy will have to devour everything in order to get my parents to agree!) I laughed out loud at some of these tips; great post!

    Another Beautiful Thing

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    1. hehehe it was my dad that cooked on this particular occasion - :)
      both my folks are incredible cooks!

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  17. Replies
    1. Hey Carly! Glad you liked it! :)
      Happy weekend!

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  18. Luckly that was never the case with us, my dad was fine with it from the start ;)
    Great suggestions though ;) :) xoxo
    http://stylesensemoments.blogspot.com/

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  19. Asking to marry someones daughter must be one of the scariest things a man has to do!

    Corinne x
    www.skinnedcartree.com

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    1. I know, one of very few reasons I'm happy I'm a woman!! ;P

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  20. Haha, amazing! Thank you for this post. Have a great Saturday!

    Jasmine x
    For a Real Woman - Instagram - Bloglovin

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  21. Hahaha I totally get the "Nails done" requirement, great post!
    www.klimver.blogspot.com

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  22. This is such a cute and funny post, thanks for sharing! I'm in no danger of anyone asking my dad to marry me.. so I'll just admire and laugh at this from afar! ;)

    http://aglassofice.blogspot.co.uk

    x

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  23. Hi jade :) LOVE your blog!!
    I am now following you <3 I ould love if you could follow back :)
    http://tammyfashionlover.blogspot.com/

    love from tammy
    Durban South Africa

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  24. Hahaha nice one Jade! For a second I thought maybe, you're getting married!!! But knowing you, I'm sure not so soon!
    Keep in touch
    xx
    www.JuneWantsItAll.com

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  25. This is so cute and funny! Thanks for sharing <3

    http://www.thestylishbipolar.com

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  26. Haha so funny and great post. You summed it up really amazing, love the last step and it´s really true, because something crazy has to happen during all the parties. :)
    Fashion Happenss

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    1. I am so sad to hear your news Lia but I totally understand it xxx

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  27. Oh this is so great !! What a read ! :)

    ~ Lu
    xx
    http://littlestepsbigheart.blogspot.com

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  28. Such a sweet, hilarious story, just like a movie, you have to pity the poor sap, haha, but nothing better than an overprotective dad.
    Simona
    Lake&Moon

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  29. Hey,
    I really like your Blog! Awesome Photos and interesting Stuff. Do you want to support each other and follow via GFC? If yes please tell me and i follow back. Lets stay in touch. :)

    Greetings Sophia xx
    M Y B L O G.
    I N S T A G R A M.

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Jade